But double standards of suspicion are relevant, oh my blue heaven..sometimes it just feels better to give in.

I'm afraid...of a certain situation. I don't think anything bad will happen...no, not really. I just have no idea what he wants. At all. He has a girlfriend. He's talked about his girlfriend to me. I've even talked to him about who I'm interested in. True, I exaggerated a little bit to cover my ass...but again, I don't know what he wants. He says he wants for us to hang out...play tennis...go bowling. He even offered to drive to my hometown and pick me up for said bowling trip. I'm trying really hard to not read too much into this situation...but I'm apprehensive about it. And the dream doesn't help at all. It totally freaked me out, and I know that it's partly influencing my mixed emotions. It took me a long time to get over this kid. A really long time, and every now and then I still feel touches of the same emotions I felt when we were together. He was the best thing that's happened to me in a long time, and you don't just forget something like that...but I'm not in any hurry to do anything with him anytime soon. I don't know. I would feel so much better about this whole thing if I knew what his motive was...if he even has any. He's a really nice guy, one of the few that are left out there, so in all actuality it's probably just a friendship thing. We have known each other for a long time...I just don't know.